You've undoubtedly have heard the saying "What Happens in Vegas Stays in Vegas"? (Footnote...I lost my cell phone for a few hours in Vegas and that stupid saying kept going through my mind - buh bye cell phone!) But contrary to the saying, I'm hear to tell you What Happened in Vegas is in this blog!
I went there with my wife for a business convention. The plane ride there was uneventful. There were three seats on each side of the aisle, and I ended up sitting next to a very attractive woman, late 40's to around 50 I would guess. The interesting thing is that I also ended up sitting next to that same woman on the trip back. The chances of that would normally be extremely low, however that woman is my wife, which brings the odds up dramatically. Get it? Odds...Vegas? Whatever.
The hotel we stayed in for the convention was about 15 minutes south of Las Vegas Boulevard, or as those of us who have been to Vegas call it - The Strip. Our hotel buffet was voted the best in Vegas, and I am here to say that this is very true. It was a little pricey at $25 a person but I've never had a better breakfast selection anywhere...and my tight pants prove it!
Slot machines are everywhere in Vegas - even at the airport. Correct me if I'm wrong (there is a first time for everything) but if you're gambling at the airport aren't you a bit, shall we say, compulsive? Isn't that like stopping to eat on the way to the restaurant? Virtually every hotel, casino, phone booth, bathroom, water fountain, and telephone pole have slot machines so why not wait until after you've left the airport? A lot of people feel that the airport is a big enough gamble even WITHOUT the slot machines. Speaking of a gamble, something that weighs over 150,000 pounds speeding down a runway at over 160 miles an hour getting off the ground doesn't make much sense. Of course billionaires like Donald Trump or Bill Gates having the haircuts they have don't make much sense either.
Okay, drum roll please...my wife and I are the only people on the face of the earth that have gone to Las Vegas for a week and not spent one cent gambling! Quick, get me the phone number for the Guinness Book of World Records! Why spend money in Nevada when we could spend it just the same at either local casino here in eastern Connecticut? (Not that we do that either.) What's that? Congress is launching an investigation into why we didn't gamble in Vegas? I can certainly suggest a thing or two they should be investigating!!! Did you know that in the original Greek, the word "Congress" actually means "Those That Gamble With Other People's Money"? Maybe Congress should move to Las Vegas - they would have less of a chance of losing the money there than in Washington DC!
Slot machines are everywhere in Vegas - even at the airport. Correct me if I'm wrong (there is a first time for everything) but if you're gambling at the airport aren't you a bit, shall we say, compulsive? Isn't that like stopping to eat on the way to the restaurant? Virtually every hotel, casino, phone booth, bathroom, water fountain, and telephone pole have slot machines so why not wait until after you've left the airport? A lot of people feel that the airport is a big enough gamble even WITHOUT the slot machines. Speaking of a gamble, something that weighs over 150,000 pounds speeding down a runway at over 160 miles an hour getting off the ground doesn't make much sense. Of course billionaires like Donald Trump or Bill Gates having the haircuts they have don't make much sense either.
Okay, drum roll please...my wife and I are the only people on the face of the earth that have gone to Las Vegas for a week and not spent one cent gambling! Quick, get me the phone number for the Guinness Book of World Records! Why spend money in Nevada when we could spend it just the same at either local casino here in eastern Connecticut? (Not that we do that either.) What's that? Congress is launching an investigation into why we didn't gamble in Vegas? I can certainly suggest a thing or two they should be investigating!!! Did you know that in the original Greek, the word "Congress" actually means "Those That Gamble With Other People's Money"? Maybe Congress should move to Las Vegas - they would have less of a chance of losing the money there than in Washington DC!
No comments:
Post a Comment