Name That Tune!

Have you ever heard a song that sticks in your mind that you wish you hadn't heard?  You know, one of those songs that you don't like but once you hear it you find yourself humming it over and over all day?  Maybe a kid's song like "The wheels on the bus go round and round" or a more adult song like "99 bottles of beer on the wall"  or any song by REO Speedwagon?  Doesn't that drive you crazy?  While I'm not here to add to anyone's insanity (although I could be talked into it )  I do want to discuss the subject of music, of which I am an expert.  Okay, maybe not an expert but I know a lot about it.  Okay, I may not know a lot about it but I do listen to the radio.  Okay, I listen to talk radio but I can have an opinion on music, can't I?

I get a kick out of some of the titles of songs, especially some of the country music songs...here's a few: "If the Phone Don't Ring You'll  Know Its Me", or "How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away" or my personal favorite "I Kissed Her Lips Goodbye and Left Her Behind For You".  Some lyrics of songs are interesting too.  Consider Lady Gaga's song "Bad Romance" with the lyric "rah, rah, ah, ah, ah, roma, roma ma, gaga olala..."  Speaking of lyrics that stick in your head!  Of course there have always been odd lyrics to songs.  How about "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts"...huh? Or how about "How much is that doggy in the window (arf-arf).  No, I did not add the barking - it's in the song.  But if I were to come up with a song like that barking would absolutely be part of it.

Most everyone has a favorite song or a favorite singer or band.  I like the early Beatles music, before they went off the deep end.  I also like much of the 60's and 70's music.  It's interesting - the only place where  I can listen to that genre of music is on an "oldies" station...an "oldies" station?  C'mon, it was only a few years ago when those records were made, right?  Yea, right!  Even the word "record" is outdated.  Some of you know the story of my youngest son.  When he was about 13 years old we bought him an old turntable with the speakers attached.  Then I showed him how to use it: I placed an LP (Long Playing Record for those of you under 30 years old) on the spindle, hit the reject knob then the record player dropped the record onto the turntable, the arm of the player swung around and landed on the record exactly in the right place...then the music started to play.  My son's eyes lit up and he yelled out "WOW, COOL!"  I instantly felt like I was 92 years old.  This machine that was commonplace back when I was a kid had become a circus side show, similar I suppose to someone using indoor plumbing for the first time...what a novelty!  Quick trivia question: how many grooves are on the average 45 record?  The answer later on...I have to make you read the rest of this somehow!

So records are no longer records, they are CD's.  Now you no longer have the pleasure of listening to the static in the background of your favorite record that you have played over and over - all of the songs now are for the most part crystal clear.  What fun is that?  Gone is the challenge of trying to stop a record from skipping by placing a penny on the arm of the record player.  Then trying to stop the record because the penny fell off and is ruining the rest of the record!  Yup, those were the days!

While most people can tell you what their favorite song is, I'll bet few can tell you right off the bat what their least favorite song is.  I of course can.  The song with this dubious distinction is Rod Stewart's "Maggie May".  How I loathe that song!  And why you may ask?  Back when I was a freshman in high school they had a DJ that played music before classes in the morning.  I wasn't too fond of school and the DJ played this song every morning for the entire school year.  I still dive to change the station when that song comes on.  Ew. 

I am always amazed at people that like all types of music.  My middle son likes virtually every type of music. Shameless plug time...He is a member of the Air Force Air National Guard Band of the Northeast (http://www.bandofthenortheast.ang.af.mil/).  If you click on "photos" he's the handsome chap in the photo with Wayne Newton standing up behind Wayne just to the right (with glasses) holding a sax.  All of our United States military family is to be congratulated for the outstanding job they all do, including these very talented musicians.  If you get a chance to see them play I highly recommend it.

Quite a few people like to sing along with their favorite singers and songs.  Some are good singers...some, not so much.  Here's where I would normally say to the not-so-good singers "you know who you are" but unfortunately they do NOT know who they are.  Have you noticed this?  That people that can't carry a tune in a bucket have no idea that they don't even have a bucket?  We must stop those people from singing by any means possible.  Here's a good non-violent way of doing that.  When they begin to sing, say, an Elton John song, ask them why Elton John sings that song.  When they answer they don't know, tell them "so YOU don't have to!"  Just don't quote me or I'll deny it all.  What's that?  It's in writing?  Well, apparently some people shouldn't write either! (Present company accepted of course!)

Answer to the trivia question: One.  There is one groove on every record.  If there was more than one, how would the record play?  DUH! (Insert smiley face here)